RSS FeedHow I Conquered Insomnia
For the longest time, my insomnia was the bane of my existence.
Kidding, but still, kinda serious.
I did not have COMPLETE insomnia; it would be possible for me to go to sleep, I just had NO CONTROL over when. I could not nap on command, sleep on command.. I mostly relied on nature to take its course and after many hours overcome my mental resistance; I would not fall asleep until I was completely spent.
I would have to get up in the morning at a specific time, so I would go to bed, and PRAY that I could fall asleep on time. Inevitably, I would just lay awake in bed, tossing and turning, for hours and hours, and then wake up to an alarm EXTREMELY tired, setting the tone for an awful day.
It sucked, and completely controlled my life in various ways:
1) Unable to nap. If I had to get up early, then I could not stay out late and be non-tired.
2) In college, I could not take any morning classes. All my classes started at 10:30 or later. I often did not go to those. I often only attended classes that started at noon or later.
3) Unable to do other morning activities. If something started at 9;30 or earlier I would pretty much rule it out of my life.
4) Fatigue throughout the day.
5) Wasted time at night. oh man, this one was BRUTAL. I would literally lay awake in bed for HOURS trying to fall asleep. Why did I not get up, and do other things instead? Because I often NEEDED to get up early (for some morning task) and didn’t want to fill a moment where I could potentially be falling asleep, with some other activity.
6) Wasting time with various sleep apnea treatments.
7) Unhappy associations with sleep. Sleep is a primary reinforcer. (I will write another post at a later date about the fundamental implications of reinforcement in guiding behavior. I am not a strict behaviorist like Skinner but I believe that reinforcement has complex ramifications for guiding behavior.) Many people enjoy it a lot. For me, though, it caused dread and anxiety.
I think I’ve made the point: It really CONTROLLED my life. A large amount of choice taken out of the equation completely.
But it’s not like I didn’t try remedies.
Things I tried
1) Sleep apnea treatments. When I was in high school, my parents took me to multiple doctors for sleep apnea. They did not know about my struggles with insomnia (it didn’t occur to me until much later that such struggles are ABNORMAL). Anyway, The stanford sleep center thought I had sleep apnea; the people at UCSF disagreed. The sleep charts taken during my sleep study suggested that I had perhaps very very mild apnea. Regardless, in desperate search for an explanation of their son’s aberrant behavior, I went through a series of surgeries. (My tonsils were removed [and then later I picked up an infection in the hospital 
], my adenoids were removed, I had surgery on my nasal septum, my uvula (the thing that dangles in the back of your throat) was resected, my adenoids grew back and were shrunk again.. et cetera.
2) Masturbating before bed (rarely useful)
3) Smoking marijuana
4) Taking over the counter sleep medication
5) Taking ambien
6) Counting integers one at a time
7) Trying to become an “early riser” like Steve Pavlina suggests
None of these things ended up being very effective. My struggles with insomnia, and the related consequences I had to endure, continued full speed ahead.
But now, I think I’ve fixed my problem. If you have had some of the laundry list of symptoms I described, I recommend trying all of the things below. Yeah, I know that “correlation is not causation”, but if you’re going through what I was going through, I think they’re worth trying. BTW, the time I lost while laying awake in bed probably costs me ~500-1200 hours a year. Not to mention my impaired skill performance throughout the day, missed opportunities, mental suffering through anxiety, et cetera
Solution
Strategy vs Tactics
This is an idea I got from the interesting business book by Chet Holmes, “The Ultimate Sales Machine“. Some executives think in terms of strategy, big picture; others think in terms of tactics, specific moves to take; the best ones think in terms of strategy (big picture) and then let others translate that into congruent tactics. The machine is more than the sum of its parts but all parts should be working towards an ideal of the big picture. etc. So I’m transforming that notion into the dualism of strategy=principles and tactics=implementation.
Tangent About Et cetera
My 8th grade English teacher Sylvia Harp, whom I detested at the time, told me that “etcetera” is something people use when they don’t know what they’re talking about. I was too young and immature to benefit from her wisdom, plus she called me out on not doing my homework, so I dropped out of the class.
Anyway, except in the context of lists, I use “etc” when I don’t really know what I’m talking about, but to suggest that there is more to the idea than what I was trying to convey, and leave it up to the reader to understand it.
Strategy/Principle: What really caused my insomnia
An active mind.
Thinking = “the voice in my head”
Quieting the voice = peace = can fall asleep naturally.
Tactics/Solution: How I cured it
1) Going to bed as soon as I feel tired – no exceptions
2) When in bed, let myself feel good about the fact that I’m tired, and that I’m also IN BED! Good feelings and no-mind typically coincide, unless they are ego-based good feelings (e.g. through comparison to others)
3) Maintaining full integrity in my life keeps the conscience quiet. Conscience = another voice that pipes up.
4) Occasional 20 minute breathing meditation practice in the morning.
5) Doing a mental RAM “brain dump” by writing down any ideas that accrue to me
6) Cleaning my room
7) Not using the computer before bed. In practice, this is extremely difficult to implement, especially if you are an addict like me. My solution is to leave my laptop at the office so I don’t have access to it at home, and therefore am forced to read in order to entertain myself. Reading burns up mental energy and leaves my mind exhausted. Of course, I will probably soon start to feel energized through reading, once the neural pathways involved become more commonplace; at that point I will have to shift to a different strategy. My intuition is that practicing any new skill is going to be mentally exhausting. We know that sleep leads to restructuring of procedural (skill) memory.
8) Avoiding processed foods. Everybody reacts to food differently, but for me, I find that highly processed foods cause my mind to race.
February 23rd, 2010 at 5:00 pm
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February 23rd, 2010 at 5:33 pm
I just went through a year of crazy sleep problems. Doctors aren't much help it seems. Not that they aren't skilled, just that they don't tend to listen to the complexities.
I suddenly got some crazy IBS in early 2009 and nearly 10 months later (even after it had healed) had major sleeping problems.
I had later read that the acne medication (tetracycline, anti-biotic) that I stopped taking after 10 years of use (to rule out as a catalyst for the aforementioned IBS issue) acts as a fairly potent anti-inflammatory. Turns out some people can't shut themselves down if the body is inflamed (which mine was).
I started back on the tetracycline and was able to sleep again almost immediately. I have since studied anti-inflammatory medication and responses in the body. Quiet interesting. If I could add another anecdote of my experience, I found that collagen (hyaluronic acid variety) helps repair the body after the toll on the body due to long term insomnia. Sleep == healing.
February 23rd, 2010 at 5:35 pm
Further to my last post, a simple blood test (Reactive-C Protein test) can easily tell if your body has inflammation. As always, check with your doctor.
March 1st, 2010 at 11:18 am
What a fantastic post – thank you for sharing. Your post just goes to show that insomnia affects different people in different ways and consequently, different things work for different people when trying to find a cure (or at least some relief).
I'll be sharing this post with readers of my blog. Thanks again.
March 2nd, 2010 at 1:05 am
You're welcome.
March 2nd, 2010 at 9:13 am
[...] said that, we’d highly recommend you read this blog post by Zachary Burt – it’s a fantastic read. Zachary shares the symptoms of his insomnia and then he tells [...]
March 17th, 2010 at 1:32 am
Very nice post. This makes people know some people's ideas on how to fight insomnia by themselves. I'm happy that you overcome it.
March 31st, 2010 at 5:58 pm
Duuude. This is so funny. I commented on your post on abundance a while back, noting that your experience mirrored mine a while back.
Now, I have also suffered from severe insomnia a few years back and sleep continues to be an issue in my life, tho much less than before. My list if things that I tried and failed at is almost identical to yours. As is my list of things that worked.
A few notes:
-The voice in the head is not the problem. It's just a sign that I have a need which is in unmet.
-When I don't sleep, it is a clear signal that I need to take care of myself better.
Other things that worked for me:
-Crying. Remember the scene in Fight Club where Edward Norton starts trying at the meeting for men with testicular cancer and that this cures his insomnia. The same have been true for me. Crying helps me move energy throughout my body and put my system in a more child-like state which is tremendously helpful when going to bed.
-Taking slow, late walks. Last year I had a habit of taking a walk at 10pm to a beautiful view point and watch how the city of Gothenburg went to sleep. Sometimes I paid attention to my breath, sometimes to the sensations in my feet, though mostly I just let my mind drift. Anyhow these walks usually made me really tired and I often fell asleep instantly afterwards. If I didn't I often had to clear my RAM and scribble stuff in my notebook.
- On RAM clearing: I find that using strong words to describe painful feelings help me relax. Instead of writing that I feel stressed, I would write that I feel fuckin aweful and that I hate myself, and my life. This doesn't necessarily have to be true a wider sense i.e. that I actually hate my life. What's important is that in the moment of lying in my bed, I may have an aweful feeling in my body, and that my ego may come up with this kind of ideas, though usually more subtle. By making the mind's interpretation of these feelings explicit, it usually becomes obvious how absurd this mental construction is. It is just a feeling, a sensation in my body. All I have to do is stay with it. Writing helps me realize this.
-Integrity is important. There is a clear correlation in my life between me not being clear and direct about my values, and me lying awake.
Some of these ideas might seem unorthodox, and if would have heard about it 3 years ago I might have laughed. Today, I know that these things helps me be more alive, more child-like and grown-up simultaneously. Which incidentally also helps me sleep better. My own conclusion is that my insomnia isn't an isolated sleeping problem. It's about my entire life.
March 31st, 2010 at 6:10 pm
Forgot to add. I really like your style man, how you write, the topics you chose and how you convey your own values throughout. A real inspiration for me. I find myself in agreement with virtually everything you write and can only wish that I had the same ability to craft awesome texts as you.
I have thought about your theory on abundance recently and will definetely try to bring that additude more and more into my life. Especially now that I soon graduate from uni and will try to find an interesting job for myself.
Thanks again dude and keep the good stuff coming!
Love
Jonas
March 31st, 2010 at 9:58 pm
Duuude. This is so funny. I commented on your post on abundance a while back, noting that your experience mirrored mine a while back.
Now, I have also suffered from severe insomnia a few years back and sleep continues to be an issue in my life, tho much less than before. My list if things that I tried and failed at is almost identical to yours. As is my list of things that worked.
A few notes:
-The voice in the head is not the problem. It's just a sign that I have a need which is in unmet.
-When I don't sleep, it is a clear signal that I need to take care of myself better.
Other things that worked for me:
-Crying. Remember the scene in Fight Club where Edward Norton starts trying at the meeting for men with testicular cancer and that this cures his insomnia. The same have been true for me. Crying helps me move energy throughout my body and put my system in a more child-like state which is tremendously helpful when going to bed.
-Taking slow, late walks. Last year I had a habit of taking a walk at 10pm to a beautiful view point and watch how the city of Gothenburg went to sleep. Sometimes I paid attention to my breath, sometimes to the sensations in my feet, though mostly I just let my mind drift. Anyhow these walks usually made me really tired and I often fell asleep instantly afterwards. If I didn't I often had to clear my RAM and scribble stuff in my notebook.
- On RAM clearing: I find that using strong words to describe painful feelings help me relax. Instead of writing that I feel stressed, I would write that I feel fuckin aweful and that I hate myself, and my life. This doesn't necessarily have to be true a wider sense i.e. that I actually hate my life. What's important is that in the moment of lying in my bed, I may have an aweful feeling in my body, and that my ego may come up with this kind of ideas, though usually more subtle. By making the mind's interpretation of these feelings explicit, it usually becomes obvious how absurd this mental construction is. It is just a feeling, a sensation in my body. All I have to do is stay with it. Writing helps me realize this.
-Integrity is important. There is a clear correlation in my life between me not being clear and direct about my values, and me lying awake.
Some of these ideas might seem unorthodox, and if would have heard about it 3 years ago I might have laughed. Today, I know that these things helps me be more alive, more child-like and grown-up simultaneously. Which incidentally also helps me sleep better. My own conclusion is that my insomnia isn't an isolated sleeping problem. It's about my entire life.
March 31st, 2010 at 10:10 pm
Forgot to add. I really like your style man, how you write, the topics you chose and how you convey your own values throughout. A real inspiration for me. I find myself in agreement with virtually everything you write and can only wish that I had the same ability to craft awesome texts as you.
I have thought about your theory on abundance recently and will definetely try to bring that additude more and more into my life. Especially now that I soon graduate from uni and will try to find an interesting job for myself.
Thanks again dude and keep the good stuff coming!
Love
Jonas
May 25th, 2010 at 12:36 am
[...] thinking. We know that thinking is often non-deliberate, and stresses us out, such as when we are trying to fall asleep. What the authors of Buddha’s Brain insightfully point out is that when one area of the brain [...]
June 15th, 2010 at 12:59 pm
I know how hard it is to deal with insomnia. I suffered frmo insomnia for years. I lost lots of weight and I barely had any energy in my body. In the end, the only pills that helped were some pills against allergy (Piriton), that my doctor recommended. I also changed my old mattress with a tempurpedic mattress… and this change also helped. Was nice to find my bed more comfortable
July 12th, 2010 at 3:00 pm
Obstructive sleep apnea (OSA) is the most common category of sleep-related breathing disorders. I found the good pillow for hekp you from apnea, are you interest? See at http://www.antisnorepillow.us/
August 20th, 2010 at 9:16 am
I'll post the same information to my blog, thanks for ideas and great article.